Shinyuu Appreciation Week
by Sunset Moth
Summary: Kaichou cooks up a crazy scheme to reshuffle the shinyuus temporarily in order to strengthen their most important ties with their true shinyuus. Mixed feelings abound! Tatewaki is abused! And what's this? Maybe even a scandal?
1. There Are Idiots in the Administration

Shinyuu Appreciation Week

There Are Idiots in the Administration Too

Disclaimer: Hayate X Blade does not own me. Nor I, Hayate X Blade.

* * *

"As you all know, during the school year, there are long periods of monotony, where very little happens. Now, I've tried to keep things interesting by interspersing Hoshitori matches in between these moments of dull, but even _they_ have become tedious after a while. Fortunately, in a brief flash of epiphany, I have come up with an idea to liven up things once more." Hitsugi paused and surveyed the room, her expression so serious that it could only be viewed as comical, if one were not part of the school assembly about to be subjected to another one of her crazy schemes anyway. "I call it, 'The Shinyuu Appreciation Week.' For one entire week, starting next week, all of the current sword-bearing pairs will be reshuffled temporarily, by our brilliant and unbiased computer system of course—"

"Of course," Akira growled from the front row of the stadium, her facing exhibiting her blatant displeasure concerning the Kaichou's current idea.

"—their beloved partners taken away from them to be replaced with a friend, a rival, or even a complete stranger," Hitsugi continued without faltering, as if that interrupted pause was part of her speech. "Those who do not wish to participate will instantly be removed from the sword-bearing list, and may only apply once more after a year's suspension. You _have_ been warned." She gave them a seraphic smile and added, "You may direct any further questions or complaints to Tatewaki. I'm sure I'll hear of it. At some point."

She stepped down the podium and strode out of the amphitheatre before any of the students could properly react.

Akira, who knew better than to talk to Tatewaki—really, who took her seriously?—followed after Hitsugi's shinyuu, who was just beginning to climb down the stairs of the stage.

"Oy, oy, Miyamoto," Akira called out. "What's the meaning of all this?"

"Ask Tatewaki," Shizuku answered distractedly, trying to get to the door before the other students could overwhelm her.

"Like Kaichou would tell her anything." Akira snorted.

"Tatewaki has ears, even if Hitsugi doesn't usually acknowledge whatever comes out of her mouth," Shizuku replied wryly and smiled.

"Still, your insight is valuable to us," Sae urged on, appearing instantly right besides Akira, startling Shizuku.

The redhead took a deep breath and led them towards the Student Council office. "She was bored." Shizuku answered simply. "I think that succinctly summarizes Hitsugi's motive."

"Couldn't she have come up with a less crazy idea?"

Shizuku stopped walking and faced Akira seriously. "This _is_ the less crazy idea."

"What could be worse than this?" Sae asked curiously.

Shizuku mumbled something under her breath and looked away in embarrassment.

"C'mon, Miyamoto. What was that crazy Kaichou originally planning?" Akira prodded.

"She wanted us to fight each other individually, and the one who lost would be the other's slave for a month," Shizuku spoke a little louder. "The one with the most slaves would be acting President in that month's time as well. With a few restrictions."

"How did you convince her out of that one?"

Shizuku flushed. "I will not dignify that with a response!"

"Ara, ara? I didn't know Shizuku would be so shy." Hitsugi said smilingly. She opened the door to her office a little wider and ushered them in. "Why, the way you reacted when you heard my idea this morning... I really thought you a bold creature, my dear!"

Shizuku turned an even darker shade of red and crossed her arms in discomfort. "It's different. What I had to say was between the two of us."

"And Tatewaki," Hitsugi reminded her.

"Nobody really cares about Tatewaki," Akira added flippantly. "Now spill. How'd you get this stubborn Kaichou to change her mind?"

"She told me that she would be jealous of all the attention my other 'slaves' would be giving me," Hitsugi answered good-humouredly. "Such a bold and adorable creature, my Shizuku is, don't you agree?"

At that point, Shizuku wanted nothing more than to hide under the Kaichou's table. She, instead, stared upwards, her expression tight-lipped and furrowed in extreme concentration.

"Yes," Sae replied, grinning slightly. "If only Akira had such cute moments too, I wouldn't find your idea so refreshingly welcoming at this moment."

"H-hey!"

"I must really applaud you for your genius," Sae continued. "With Akira still waiting for the 'perfect moment' to challenge you, I'm beginning to find this monotonous lifestyle a little boring myself. I once almost contemplated challenging you myself and intentionally losing, simply so I could rise up the ranks again, and beat a few people up in the process." She said this all with such straight-faced calm that Akira couldn't help but gape at her incredulously.

"I'm glad someone agrees around here," Hitsugi said and sighed dramatically, sliding into her leather chair with enviable grace. "There has been a lot of insubordination going on in this office of late."

"H-hey!" It was Shizuku's turn to protest indignantly.

"If you are willing, I can subtly _influence_ the computer system in our favour," Hitsugi spoke conspiratorially to Sae.

Sae laughed. "And where would the fun be in that?"

"I suppose you're right," Hitsugi said mournfully. "Still, you would have made for an interesting shinyuu, Sae." She leaned back and looked at all of them mock-gravely. "There is nothing we can do, but leave these all in the hands of Fate now."

* * *

OMAKE:

A lithe blonde looked at the screen and crossed her arms in slight irritation. "People really have to stop invoking me," Fate Testarossa mumbled under her breath. "I have better things to do then randomly draw new shinyuu pairings from outdated Earth software just for someone's entertainment."

Bardiche spoke up, "Sir, I detect a Lost Logia within a fifty-mile radius of this area. Shall we engage?"

Fate's eyes lit up. "Lead on, Bardiche."

* * *

Isuzu looked up from her Crystal Ball and muttered to herself, "Uh oh..."

* * *

A/N: Another one for Bamboo! Because she's awesome.

Anyway, you could say that this was an extension of my idea from my other HxB fic. I just thought to myself... What if Hitsugi actually _does_ try to reshufffle the shinyuus...? And well...this was born. Haha. I need suggestions for the reshufflings, as I have no idea who to pair up with who. I'm kind of a loyalist in that sense... Which really begs the question of why I did this in the first place. (Rest assured, they will not end up falling for their "new" shinyuus. But it'd be fun to see them interact with each other.) Also, I wrote this without much planning, so there are probably flaws somewhere in this fic...

...Gotta love this fandom. Brings up my spirits when I feel so down.


	2. The Idiot and Her Dilemma

Part 1 - The Idiot and Her Dilemma

"This sucks," groaned Jun as she huddled in a corner of the room she shared with Ayana. A small sketchpad lay before her feet, angled slightly. She hugged her knees, rested her head on top of her arms, and pouted. "This sucks," she repeated a second time, with more conviction.

"One would think," Ayana growled, her thumbs smashing violently against the buttons of her controller, "that you would be extremely happy, now that we are paired together. Even if it's only temporary."

"Oh, Ayana, you wound me!" Jun shouted indignantly and pointed a finger at Ayana. "Of course I'm happy—in fact, I am in utter bliss right now! Ecstatic even. To insinuate that I am not happy is to say that _I_ am losing a bit of my drive! This young body has lots of time left before that would ever come to pass, _if_ it ever comes to pass."

The furious button-smashing stopped for a few seconds as Ayana stared at the screen blankly. After a few seconds of dead silence, she muttered to herself, "I'm just not in the mood for this right now..."

"Is Ayana, at long last, coming into terms with her own fiery, passionate feelings for me?" Jun asked joyously. "Has this new partnership caused the emotional and physical barrier between us to finally give way? I don't think I'm ready to hear her confession, but if she's ready and willing, who am I to complain?" She grabbed onto the headboard of her bed and scrambled upwards just as Ayana reached for her baseball bat.

"You are just so bloody irritating," Ayana snarled. "Why must I be stuck with you of all the people in this school?"

"Because I am _that_ awesome?" Jun supplied mock-seriously.

"What have you been whining about anyway?" Ayana asked curiously and prodded Jun's sketchbook with her bat. She squinted, and squatted down to give the piece of paper a closer look. After a moment's scrutiny, she frowned. "Is it just me, or is your writing just _that_ incomprehensible?"

"It's a secret code that Yuuho and I had developed when we were younger." Jun sniffed and crossed her arms imperiously. "My handwriting is perfectly legible. When I want it to be." She paused, considering her next words. "As for what I've been pondering over for quite some time now—"

"A few minutes hardly equates to 'quite some time now'," Ayana cut in.

"I've been thinking about who should be the seme, and who should be the uke in this newfound relationship of ours," Jun spoke and put her hand over her heart, gazing down at Ayana woefully. "It is a very hard decision that I must make for the both of us. Appreciate me a little more, won't you?"

"S-seme?" Ayana sputtered. She closed her eyes and gritted her teeth, letting out a feral growl a split second later. A burst of black energy filled the air, making Jun whimper from the top of her bunker bed.

"You know what I mean, Ayana!"

"No, I don't," Ayana snarled and pushed her long sleeves back towards her elbows. "Enlighten me."

"I was trying to decide on who should be Heaven, and who should be Earth!" Jun finally shouted and retracted immediately, using her blanket as scant protection against Ayana's possible wrath.

"Then why didn't you say so in the first place?" Ayana heard a muffled reply. "Say that again!"

"It's coz that'd be no fun!"

"Aah, so you really are that kind of person after all," Ayana said cruelly, with an ambiguity that would rival badly translated manga.

"I've always been that kind of person," Jun retorted, threw back the blanket covering her head, and crossed her arms. "As your roommate, I would have thought that you would have gotten used to it by now."

"No, getting used to it would be letting you get away with those kinds of perverse comments all the time," Ayana said.

Jun paused and stared at Ayana sombrely. Suddenly, her eyes crinkled, and her lips shifted into a huge grin. "Your loss!" Chortling with glee, she headed for the window, cracked it open, and jumped out before Ayana could grab her.

Ayana's head popped out of the window just as Jun slammed against the grass below with a rolling tumble. "So, have you decided?"

Her roommate stood up with a flourish and bowed deeply before her. "You will be my Heaven, and I will be your Earth. Now, do with me what you will!"

Poor Mr. Nailbat came sailing out of the window to slam squarely against Jun's forehead. She fell down—a one hit KO from her temporary, fuming shinyuu, two floors up.

She woke up with a headache a couple of minutes later and found herself half-sitting, half-lying on top of an infirmary bed. Her hands were tied behind her back. Ayana stood before her, looking more thoughtful than menacing. For once.

"Ah, so Ayana likes this kind of kink after all?" Jun asked mildly, grinning slightly even as her head pounded incessantly.

"Just be glad weapons are not allowed inside the infirmary," Ayana snarled through gritted teeth.

"…and I keep telling Kaichou that she should draw up a list of items to ban, because this is getting really ridiculous," a member of the Medic Corp spoke angrily. "It's bad enough that we have to deal with paralyzed students who've been affected by that Inugami individual. Do you know how hard it is to find a damn exorcist?"

"Why not just ask Isuzu to undo the spell?"

"Ah, good point." The medic agreed with a frown. "I suppose I can go hunt for her now."

The other medic she was talking to added, "Kuga-san, the boss says you're free to go. Just try not to bait the other students too much in the future. We don't really like to see you inside the infirmary. It…makes the other occupants nervous."

"Hey, I don't take advantage of other students when they're in a weakened state!" Jun protested as she watched the two walk away. "I only do that to Shizuma."

"Jun," Ayana spoke suddenly.

"What can I say? She's absolutely adorable in hospital clothes!"

"Jun," Ayana repeated her name with a bit of impatience.

"What, Ayana-chan? I was just telling the truth," Jun grumbled and pouted.

"Can you stop calling me that?" Ayana said as pleasantly as she could which took a lot of effort in itself. "Anyway, I think you should be Heaven."

"Oh? So you'd prefer it if I took the lead?" Jun smirked. "Ah, it would be interesting to see Ayana's passive side. Would you like me to be as gentle as possible? Or do you like things rough?"

"No, no," Ayana replied with a firm shake of her head. "It's just that… I'm not ready to be Heaven again."

Jun's teasing smile faltered. She blinked and scrutinized Ayana's distant expression. "You don't trust yourself enough. You're still afraid of yourself, aren't you?" When her friend didn't answer, she spoke again, "Or is it because only one person can fill the Earth position for you?"

"It's hard to let something like that go." Ayana answered vaguely. Jun sighed and offered Ayana a small smile.

"Alright, whatever makes you feel better."

Ayana looked at her with pained eyes, a first for Jun. "Thank you."

* * *

A/N: Stay tune for our next mystery ship! Haha. Hopefully, it doesn't take me months to update again. :P We'll see.


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